11 Proven Ways to Deal With Disappointment
Disappointment is a difficult feeling to deal with, and every new day may bring about something that makes you feel disappointed. In some cases, disappointments can be devastating and life-altering. Some are minor, inconvenient, or simply make you grimace.
As a human being, you'll surely be disappointed or let down by others from time to time. Disappointment is a part of life, and it could occur in scenarios like a friend canceling plans at the last minute, things not going according to plan, families forgetting important moments in your life, etc. Time is becoming increasingly limited, stress is at an all-time high, and relationships are suffering as a result.
Although it's not possible to prevent people from behaving badly or disappointing you, it doesn't mean you have to let it keep you from living a joyous and prosperous life.
These techniques can assist you in overcoming your disappointments and anger and moving on with confidence:
Allow your feeling
Feelings of despair, worry, or rage might arise when you are rejected, let down, or betrayed. Rather than attempting to push these emotions down, it's crucial to acknowledge them. Humans have been programmed to form trust, secure relationships with others, and seek help from those we care about in times of need. In the past, our forefathers and mothers lived in tribes, and the strong social links existing among the tribes made the likelihood of overcoming an enemy or predator, assault, famine, or bad weather high.
As a result, it's normal to be dissatisfied and feel let down when the individuals you trust fail to deliver. Grounding yourself may be as simple as putting your feelings into words. Also, ask yourself if your feelings are acceptable for the moment or whether they are being fueled by previous disappointments. Unless you need to tackle a powerful pattern, try to concentrate just on the present circumstance.
Discuss It with a Friend Or Family Member
If you wish to effectively deal with an episode of disappointment, one of the key elements is to ensure that you must not overlook gaining an expansive and broader perspective on the situation. And previous experiences have shown that one of the best ways to achieve this is by seeking people like friends and family that you can have intelligent conversations with about the situation.
This way, you can relieve your inner burden, sort things out for yourself, and come to terms with the situation rather than attempting to shove it away or ignore it.
And through this discussion with your close buddy, you'll be able to see the problem from a different angle.
This individual can assist you in regaining your footing and avoiding turning a molehill into a mountain. And they can also assist you in creating a strategy that can push you to move forward with your life.
Acknowledge Your Unmet Needs
Before you can deal with disappointment, you have to identify what's causing it. Is it a bad grade? A broken heart? The end of an important relationship? Once you know why you're disappointed, it will be easier to figure out how to start working through your feelings.
Allow yourself to feel the unfulfilled need that makes you feel let down and try to connect it to previous disappointments you've experienced. Figure out if your disappointment is unique to this scenario, or are you more reactive to this need not being satisfied because of your prior experiences? Make an effort to separate the past from the present. Acknowledge how disappointed you are with the unfulfilled need, and then decide whether you want to accept the situation or take action.
Look After Yourself
Try to find ways to fulfill your unmet needs by yourself. For instance, you can go alone if you had plans to watch a movie with your friend and they failed to show up. Look for other buddies that you can invite to accompany you.
If you're looking for support and relaxation, try taking a warm bath or going for a stroll in the woods. If you require practical support, consider asking others for help or purchasing services. What counts is that you don't quit and let your resentment fester in the background. Think about what a "healthy adult" might do in this situation.
Instead of increasing the pain by being self-critical after disappointing behavior by other people, try to keep your feelings in check and attempt to be gracious to yourself.
Determine Whether Or Not You Need To Speak Out
Consider whether speaking out about your emotions of dissatisfaction or betrayal might be beneficial. Will this individual be able to receive the message or will they get defensive and try to aggravate the situation? Consider how essential something is to you, knowing that it's crucial to select your fights. What do you want to get out of the talk (e.g., an apology, a pledge not to repeat the mistake, etc.)?
If you feel compelled to speak up, try as much as possible to do it calmly without an angry outburst that could exacerbate the situation. If it's going to be a challenging talk, it may be wise to prepare your remarks ahead of time.
Examine Your Expectations
You're setting yourself up for constant disappointment and heartbreak if you expect people to always be perfect or even yourself. As a result, you should lower your expectations.
Whenever you're unhappy with something you did, something another person did, or the outcome of a scenario in your life, consider asking yourself if this will matter in 5 years or 5 days?
This will give you insight on how to react and ensure that you don't make mountains out of molehills and adjust your expectations.
Consider if your expectations are realistic in this scenario and whether the individual is in a good place to accomplish what you demand from them. For instance, the person may be too preoccupied with other important duties that have barely given them a chance for themselves or a deadline coming up soon.
In such cases, you don't have to take anything too seriously. You may need to change your expectations and actions. Consider if you are clearly and courteously conveying your expectations. If the person in question is a close friend or family member, assume kindness until there's compelling evidence that shows otherwise.
Stop brooding by looking for diversions. Many individuals become stuck in a negative mental spiral when something doesn't work out. This aggravates the unpleasant mood and increases the likelihood of a depressive episode.
It's preferable to take a break from this downward spiral and try something new. Take a walk or go hiking. Take a walk across town or watch a thrilling movie to keep yourself occupied. Relax and meditate. Breathing exercises might also help you relax and wind down.
Set Boundaries If Needed
If you discover that this person has a track record of betraying or letting you down, then you have to figure out a way of shielding yourself from them.
What is the best way to take care of yourself if, after speaking out, the individual still refuses to accept responsibility or change their behavior? Is it sensible to come in contact with this person less frequently or to maintain a more informal relationship?
Determine if this person is worth keeping in your life or if your time and effort would be better channeled elsewhere. You could also inform the individual that you won't put up with frequent heartbreaks, broken promises, or being let down. If they go on to hurt you, make it clear what the results will be. Setting boundaries can help you regain your sense of value and self-respect by making you feel emotionally safe.
Learn From It
Instead of allowing the sadness and negative feelings that are often associated with disappointment and let-down to get to you, think of it as a chance to learn and develop as a person. By asking yourself some insightful questions, you'll be able to take more from the situation. Such questions are: "What is the take away from this situation?" What should I have done differently to avoid this disappointment? Etc.
Perhaps you can discover that the next time you find yourself in an identical scenario or working on a project with another person, you'll be able to communicate more effectively.
It could also help you learn how to strike a better balance between work and relaxation, ensure you have clarity of thought, and don't make mistakes.
This situation can even make you realize how important it is to make a significant alteration in your life by beginning to spend little or no time with people who have a history of disappointing you or always looking for opportunities to make you feel like a disappointment.
Develop More Resilience And Adaptability
People need to learn how to concentrate on the things they have control over while accepting the things they cannot. This way, it will be easy to accept disappointments and view them as a normal part of life. That is, is the whole importance of resilience. It's very normal and acceptable to be dissatisfied. However, this is only a transitory situation, and individuals must find a way to progress.
People may view life's events as a sign that they will not obtain what they desire if things don't go according to plan. There are several approaches to achieving objectives and obtaining what is required in life. These "methods" may be something that people do not even know. It's only people with a flexible attitude that can consider being open to new possibilities that help them overcome disappointments.
Research has shown that one of the most effective ways to increase resilience is to develop realistic assessments of what is required in life. The objective is for people to stop fantasizing about what may be and instead accept what they presently have in their lives. The capacity to discriminate between the means and the ends is a trait of self-actualized persons. These individuals can concentrate on what they truly seek while remaining open to a variety of options for achieving it.
Take a Break
When you solely focus on working on your career and objectives, there is every tendency to develop undue stress and it could also lead to a loss of perspective. And the truth is that sometimes all you need is a breather to recover from a setback. So relax, refresh, have some fun, and take your mind away from every other thing.
You'll be in a better position to embrace and learn from everything that has occurred after you've taken that break from your goals and objectives.
Take some time, once you've regained your composure, to consider how you may better balance your work and time for fun and relaxation.
You'll discover that when you have a good balance between those two aspects, it will be easier to deal with disappointments and things not going as planned in a more productive and psychologically focused manner.
Boost Your Self-Esteem
After experiencing a letdown, improving your self-esteem will go a long way in ensuring that you avoid being sunk too deep into self-criticism and bad feelings.
It will also help you not to feel so disappointed in yourself as you once were, and in dealing with disappointments with more clarity of mind and emotional stability.
This would also make it easier for you not to shift the blame on others in order to feel better about yourself and learn more from this circumstance to achieve greater outcomes next time.
Try as much as possible to be your advocate and best friend each time people disappoint and let you down. Embrace and process your emotions, act kindly to yourself, find a way to solve your needs, speak up when necessary, and create boundaries if there's a need for that.
Above all, strive to learn from your mistakes and don't become discouraged by other people's problems. Even though you didn't choose the scenario, you have to choose how to react.
Are you ready to meet a group of like-minded people who can help motivate you and reinforce all of these techniques? Our GOFINITY GoGetters community is full of entrepreneurs who support each other and have fun! Learn more about how becoming a GOFINITY consultant can impact your life for the better.